Dear Friends,
I haven’t been very reliable sending you Soft Hearts newsletters in recent times. There’s been a bit happening, especially for me personally. If you will indulge me, let me explain.
After a four-month battle with cancer, my mother, Jill, passed away. As hard as it was to say goodbye to mum, in the midst of our family’s grief, we were also grateful, particularly for mum’s fierce love for her family. Mum was feisty and faith filled. Prone to sometimes worry, mum died with enormous strength, great faith and incredible peace.
Ten days after her death we celebrated mum’s life well. Laughter, tears, music and food. Lots of food – lovingly bringing the best of mum’s recipes to life – pasties, jelly slice and lemon slice. Nom nom. Mum was a fabulous cook. My brother, sister and I shared the eulogy. Concluding my words, I shared this memory of our life in Victoria, from when I was in primary school:
Some of my fondest Camperdown memories involve mum’s kitchen. Egg and bacon pies, lamb stew, roast chicken, with homemade stuffing and gravy – slices and sponges. Another famous recipe was mum’s Ginger Fluff – a ginger flavoured sponge cake. We kids would always hover expectantly, her trusty Mixmaster whirring as it prepared the cake batter. We knew that after the batter was in the cake tin, and the tin in the oven – the Mixmaster beaters, still dripping with batter, were up for grabs. Like chicks in a nest waiting for mother bird to deposit food in their beaks, we would greedily squawk for those beaters. There was nothing better than licking those beaters.
Actually, there was. As good as the beaters tasted, the icing covered, cream-filled sponge fresh out of the oven was always better. In the end, the beaters were only ever a foretaste of a much better feast to come.
All through her life, mum has, in the words of the Psalmist, “tasted and seen that the Lord is good”. For more than 80 years Jilly has been ‘licking the beaters’ of life.
Face to face with Jesus, reunited with Gran and so many other saints that have gone before her, she’s enjoying the eternal feast – cake, cream, icing and all. And one day because the legacy of her life, so too will we, who following her example, surrender our lives to the same Lord.
It wasn’t the strength of mum’s faith that held her secure as she slipped from this world to the next, but the strength of the One in whom she placed her faith.
We all experience loss. It’s an excruciatingly hard, but inevitable part of the human journey. Some of you are experiencing dizzying waves of grief even now – as you mourn the loss of a loved one, or a dream, or a relationship. It was the late Queen Elizabeth who famously once said that “grief is the price we pay for love”.
As isolating as grief can be, it doesn’t need to be a journey we walk on our own. The simple presence of others prepared to travel with us in our pain can bring great comfort, as it has for me. More still, there’s the affirmation that God draws near the broken hearted (Psalm 34:7) and promises to comfort those who mourn (Matthew 5:4).
So, if you’re struggling with grief today, for whatever reason, know it’s OK to put your hand up for help. If not a friend, perhaps a local pastor or minister, they are always good for a chat, or a medical professional. Of course, Lifeline is only ever a call or text away – 13 11 14.
Every blessing,
CEO and Superintendent, Wesley Mission
